How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
