he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
