sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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