McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
He better not be in your backpack
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
