She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize
