at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
