Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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