we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize