So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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