it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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