I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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