I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
