That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
