How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
