You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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