this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Randomize
