Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
