i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
