did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
