she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
