thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize