I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
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