can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
