ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Randomize
