White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
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