he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
