i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize