he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
