dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
