Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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