Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
