Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
