you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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