return my video game
where are you?
Hypothermia
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
