I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
