She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Just pee around me
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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