what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
