She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
