what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
50% drunk capacity currently
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
