hell yes lets make some ravioli
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
