can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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