Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize
