Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
