go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
