I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
