I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'm at about main and main street
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
