Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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