BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
