How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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