So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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