There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Those nachos came to me in a dream
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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