You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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